Tuesday, September 19

Slouching toward Repentance

I should have been warned when I came on campus from distance learning. I wasnt. Locked in your little learning cave with no one to look over your shoulder and determine your posture I found that certain ways to situate your bent form upon your chair produced better results. Facing the extracted diatribe of some student who could not be forced to put down their virtual mike pulled the feet, pushed the head, and dropped the shoulders down toward comforta slouch.
Ive had to suffer a rude awakening by coming on campus. Things just dont squish down as nicely. There was of course the ramrodstraight proper posture that was required during temperamental exams to keep the sweat dripping in the right place. There was the proctor in the room to consider as well. But on campus no reprieve is to be found.
Back in the slouching glory days I found the purchase of the right sort of chair facilitates arrangements. Situated with high levels of support upon back no matter how far down the head sinks is essential. The seat must be long. Various other accomplices must also be situated near by. Desks must be at the convenient level to serve the dual role of foot and computer rest. Enough room must be provided on the sides to allow the feet to slide past your dear electronic pet and embrace with the knees. Sitting sideways in my chair a nearby bed also helped me assume a different posture.
Family members will notice. Younger brothers find greet glee in pointing out unglamorous habits. Companys presencepresents an especially tempting time. Your embarrassed for only a moment though. You can always excuse yourself to write that Logic paper in the comfort of your own consciences etiquette.
There are advantages. Many folding camp chairs have perfected low-profile comfort seating. I camp an expert due to distance learning training. My dad found these same chairs extremely uncomfortable until I gave several lectures on the proper way to sit in camp chairs. I still camp happier than he does.
No more camp. Its campus. Falling into my dorm room chair the four square spindles that support my back give me only one seating arrangement. Straight. I attempt to slouch in chapel only to find that the legs that support over a six foot frame almost touch the lectern. My toes are stared at from above. They beat a hasty retreat under the chair and my back complains but straightens. Becoming just about a corpse craving my comfort I sneak toward the library to find relief. In seeing the evidence of a round head of foam my hopes rise only to sink with the chair that only cushes in the center. Impossible! A chair must have foam at the end of the seat to lodge a perfect slouch.
Only dorm lounges have given slight consolation as I try and repent of my past and conform to a straight life. Im like the boy who was standing up in church. When his mom told him to sit down he obeyed but told her I may be sitting up on the outside but Im still standing on the inside. Im slouching toward repentance, but dont be fooled: Im still slouching on the inside.

1 Comment:

Ruthie said...

Thought I'd take a look when I saw this site's address on your facebook. You are very creative, and this post made me smile.